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The Life Purpose of INFJs by Darbright

I'm always amazed to find greater insight into why I am the way I am. Enjoy the article and if you like it you should visit Darbright's blog.

Peace, 

Mystic Dog Ears

The Life Purpose of INFJs

by DARBRIGHT on MAY 9, 2011

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When I write this article, I write with a sense of apprehension, some trembling and a whole lot of misgivings. Who am I to decide what the life purpose of an entire category of psychological types is? :-p

Still, this is something that many INFJs might find useful. At the very least it will give you a point of reference to start working from.

So I’ve finally given in to this truly irritating need to share this piece of information. However, as you read this, take in mind that I am writing from my personal opinions and experience, and that I am writing specifically for the INFJs of this world searching for their life purpose.

Ok… after having given enough disclaimers, you may or may not accept what I have to share, but nonetheless here it is.

The Life Purpose of INFJs

If you are an INFJ, I trust that you will know what I mean about the endless and agonizing search for meaning in life. A search for a life purpose that transcends the physical existence of what it means to be a human being and not just another mindless member of the human race.

You have an unrelenting need to be “different”, somehow drawn apart from everyone else. Yet it isn’t a need, but a knowing that you are different. To you, the physical world seems ridiculous and without any lasting significance. In other words, you find the day to day existence and idle chatter of the people around you mundane and “meaningless” in the larger scheme of life and the universe.

While you feel this need to be different, you may also find yourself fighting it just so that you can fit into society. Yet while you fight this need, you still end up being different and weird anyway.

It’s been bugging me why the number of INFJs has been pegged at around 1-2% of the human population. For all I know, it could be more because INFJs can be really good at hiding in plain sight with different groups of people. But still, why such a small number?

Could it be that INFJs are a dying breed because we do not fit into modern society? That psychological preferences that belong to an INFJ are becoming obsolete and useless?

Perhaps if I were to take a larger perspective that everything in life and nature exists for a reason. Could it be that INFJs are needed only in small numbers?

Think a  little about this.

In large numbers, INFJs would probably cause the entire mechanism that is based on producing physical goods and services to a grinding halt. The truth is, INFJs don’t function well in repetitive and mechanical environments that separate humanity from spirituality.

When it comes to life purpose, an INFJ is simply not designed to be another cogwheel in the machinery of modern society.

So what then is the Life Purpose of an INFJ?

I dare to say this because it might resonate for some of you INFJs who read this blog.

The life purpose of an INFJ is to be the one who brings hope to others, to bring light into the darkness, to be the ones who gently guide a lost soul back onto the path towards the Light.

Your work is in the intangible and metaphysical world. You intuitively understand psychological processes and intentions of those you come into contact with. Insight into human nature is so blindingly obvious to you that sometimes you are left in amazement that others can’t see what you see.

And because you understand how the human mind reacts to stimuli, you are sometimes left in a bind on how to behave and what to say. Why? Because you do not want your words and actions to be construed as self-serving or manipulation for your own selfish gain.

Your gift is to work with people, to help them for their own highest good. And sometimes, even to your own detriment. But then again, don’t you find yourself submerging your own needs and well-being so that another might be better off instead?

That’s right. You are a dumb, self-sacrificing piece of work who will probably end up on the rubbish dumps of society once you’ve outlived your usefulness.

Yet, your mental operating system seems to be set to wanting the best for others by default. And it’s a pretty damn hard thing to change how you are wired no matter how hard you try, right?

Hard To Fit Into Modern Society

Do you find it almost impossible to fit into modern society where the primary and often sole purpose is to win at all costs?

In a dog-eat-dog world, do you feel that you would be torn apart, chewed up and spat out by those who would use you for their own gain without a second thought?

Do you feel that in order to survive, you need to deny who you are and become someone else?

It’s tough isn’t it?

When I say this, I don’t mean that other psychological types don’t feel the same way. But for INFJs, this same feeling is a deep, intense loathing of being untrue to yourself and an almost insurmountable inner psychological barrier.

While other types are able to set this feeling aside and still function fairly well in society, INFJs who are in touch with their spiritual awareness find it almost debilitating to “kill” their spiritual selves just to fit in.

When you do, you are still rarely able to stay in any job, no matter how “perfect” you may be on the outside. When the work you do is divorced from meaning and purpose, you find it impossible to stay in it for the long term. It’s another reason why so many INFJs jump from job to job, hoping to find their passion and life purpose.

What You Need…

You have a need to do something good for humanity and yet find people too taxing on your senses to tolerate human company for long. It’s a contradiction that is hard to resolve… wanting the good for humanity yet needing the distance from crowds and strangers. But it is so… INFJ…

When it comes to the metaphysical or spiritual world, you revel in it. You are intensely curious about life and life after death. You have this need to discover the metaphysical and spiritual worlds, to find out how they work and how they impact our existence on this planet as physical beings. You are keenly interested in the invisible unseen nature of our existence.

In a world that is driven by science and physical evidence, you may find your true selves displaced. There is no “need” for your work and passion in a world that driven to accumulate more physical wealth, more status and more “stuff”.

While you understand that material stuff is necessary, you find it hard to devote your life to the pursuit of material wealth and material wealth alone.

Oh yes, you can try. You even make several attempts to pursue wealth accumulation. But if I’m correct, you probably find yourself giving up along the way simply because there is no lasting significance in the pursuit of material wealth.

Ideal Positions for INFJs

If you have been searching for what to do with your life, no doubt you have come across several places which say that ideal vocations for INFJs are pastors, psychologists, writers, or anything that has to do with people and helping people. I won’t repeat those vocations here because they are already extensively covered on many other websites.

Of course, you will find INFJs in very different vocations. INFJs have an interesting set of cognitive abilities that allow them to excel in different professions.

But I’m writing this post for the INFJs who are specifically searching for a larger life purpose than just doing a job and going home. I am writing for INFJs who feel their calling to a larger “higher” purpose in life and who find themselves lost in our modern society where there is little room for the spiritual and metaphysical in every day life.

I can’t tell you exactly what you should be doing. Everyone’s situation is different. What’s available to one will not be available to another. What’s needed in one place will be different from somewhere else. As much as I wish there could be a clear and specific answer for you, all I can really share is a direction you need to go.

You need to find a way to express your abilities and drive to help humanity. It is the only way you can find real inner joy and fulfillment. It’s how you fulfill your life purpose.

The Contradiction That Is INFJ Explained

I understand that it’s immensely contradictory for someone who has an almost pathological need for lots of alone time to be involved with helping people. But for an INFJ, it’s just the way it is. In your need to walk both the darkness and the light, you have to find a balance between the pull of both sides.

And in finding that balance of dynamic tension, you come to understand many aspects of human nature that exists in every one of us. In finding yourself, you develop that experience and understanding that allows you deep, almost empathetic insights into human nature. Because of the need to explore your inner world of awareness, you come to know the deepest depths of despair and the highest heights of joy.

In truth, yours is not an easy place to be. In other words, it sucks to be you. 

Being an INFJ on the path of spiritual awakening is not an easy calling or a simple path to walk. In the world of the spiritual, it sometimes feel as though you are the trailblazer where you are.

You are the one who has to break the path of the yet unknown to make it known.

You have to walk many inner worlds and feel many intense emotions that may drive others insane. You might even have scared others off with the level of your intensity when it is unleashed. 

Your Life Purpose – INFJ

I dare say this. As an INFJ, when you have traveled the inner worlds that you need to walk, you will grow into the person you need to be. In your youth, you may wish that you have not said or done many things that you have. You probably found yourself misunderstood by those around you even though you have done things with the best of intentions.

Most of the times, anyway. 

I have to tell you, that misunderstanding is not going to change. You are going to meet a lot of people who are unaware and unawakened. People who are like cavemen in their awareness, others who seek to manipulate with a smile for their own selfish gains, and others who are treasures yet to be discovered.

You need to be clear about your intentions and purpose about working for the highest good of all. Your physical actions may be misunderstood, which is only “normal”. This is simply because people place meanings on your actions based on their own personal beliefs and experience.

As you gain in experience and understanding, you learn the behaviors, words and actions needed to gently guide others onto paths that are for the highest good. I know, it’s very presumptuous to think you know what is the highest good, but you’ll figure out how to deal with it along the way.

In your youth, you are still developing your ability to find that balance between the darkness and the light. You are still trying to comprehend why you are the way you are. Intense emotions and feelings trigger off actions that you do not want to do, yet find yourself doing anyway.

In the life of an INFJ, I would say that’s pretty par for the course.

As you gain understanding and insight, you will learn to differentiate feelings from emotions. And you will learn how to trust your intuition while managing your often overwhelming emotions. Can’t separate the two just yet? Well, it’s part of the learning curve.

It is in the walking of this path that you develop yourself. It is in this path that you gain your almost unbelievable “life wisdom” and spiritual connection that you need just to survive your turbulent youth. It is in the understanding of your own intense, passionate and wildly emotional nature that you come to understand others around you.

If anyone thinks you are unemotional, boring and dull, it’s because they have not gained the trust to be in your inner circle. In other words, they have not proven themselves worthy of access to the innermost thoughts, feelings and core of your being. To let them in is to allow a bull into a china shop, where their thoughtless actions would break too  many precious things without them even being aware of it.

It’s not an easy path when you are so open to the thoughts and emotions of others around you. Sensitive without understanding, intuitive without experience. You find yourself wanting to rebel against the unrelenting and hard nature that is this world, where the primary and often only purpose is self gain and survival at the expense of others.

It’s why many INFJs need to find isolation and peace. It isn’t so much that you want to avoid people, but that prolonged exposure to the emotions and actions of others affect you so greatly that sometimes you find yourself exhausted and drowning in emotional tsunamis.

A harsh word that is water off a duck’s back to others can hit you hard and stay with you for days until you learn to clear that inner dissonance from your soul. Yes, you need to learn how to work the inner worlds until you find your balance and harmony again.

As you struggle in the cocoon of inexperience and emotional turbulence, you are developing the strength and abilities you need to help humanity for the moment when you break free of shackles that have been imposed both externally and internally.

In short, your life purpose, as a spiritually awakened and aware INFJ, is to bring light to humanity. To spark off the awareness and understanding of the spiritual dimensions that are part of the heritage of humanity. It’s not an easy path, but it’s your destination and life calling.

It’s often thankless work while you do it, but the effects of your work will continue to resonate even after you have gone home.

INFJ - This Feeling I Get...

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INFJ - Yea, Its Kinda Like That

The Secret Truth About INFJs

This is so on the money. Its nice to hear what you've always known but never dared express to others. Nobody would understand and you know it. They think they would but they wouldn't.

INFJ - Like Jesus on a Luck Dragon

This is so true!

Portrait of an INFJ - The Protector

Portrait of an INFJ - Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Judging
(Introverted Intuition with Extraverted Feeling)

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The Protector

As an INFJ, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you take things in primarily via intuition. Your secondary mode is external, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit with your personal value system.

INFJs are gentle, caring, complex and highly intuitive individuals. Artistic and creative, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities. Only one percent of the population has an INFJ Personality Type, making it the most rare of all the types.

INFJs place great importance on havings things orderly and systematic in their outer world. They put a lot of energy into identifying the best system for getting things done, and constantly define and re-define the priorities in their lives. On the other hand, INFJs operate within themselves on an intuitive basis which is entirely spontaneous. They know things intuitively, without being able to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the subject at hand. They are usually right, and they usually know it. Consequently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions. This is something of a conflict between the inner and outer worlds, and may result in the INFJ not being as organized as other Judging types tend to be. Or we may see some signs of disarray in an otherwise orderly tendency, such as a consistently messy desk.

INFJs have uncanny insight into people and situations. They get "feelings" about things and intuitively understand them. As an extreme example, some INFJs report experiences of a psychic nature, such as getting strong feelings about there being a problem with a loved one, and discovering later that they were in a car accident. This is the sort of thing that other types may scorn and scoff at, and the INFJ themself does not really understand their intuition at a level which can be verbalized. Consequently, most INFJs are protective of their inner selves, sharing only what they choose to share when they choose to share it. They are deep, complex individuals, who are quite private and typically difficult to understand. INFJs hold back part of themselves, and can be secretive.

But the INFJ is as genuinely warm as they are complex. INFJs hold a special place in the heart of people who they are close to, who are able to see their special gifts and depth of caring. INFJs are concerned for people's feelings, and try to be gentle to avoid hurting anyone. They are very sensitive to conflict, and cannot tolerate it very well. Situations which are charged with conflict may drive the normally peaceful INFJ into a state of agitation or charged anger. They may tend to internalize conflict into their bodies, and experience health problems when under a lot of stress.

Because the INFJ has such strong intuitive capabilities, they trust their own instincts above all else. This may result in an INFJ stubborness and tendency to ignore other people's opinions. They believe that they're right. On the other hand, INFJ is a perfectionist who doubts that they are living up to their full potential. INFJs are rarely at complete peace with themselves - there's always something else they should be doing to improve themselves and the world around them. They believe in constant growth, and don't often take time to revel in their accomplishments. They have strong value systems, and need to live their lives in accordance with what they feel is right. In deference to the Feeling aspect of their personalities, INFJs are in some ways gentle and easy going. Conversely, they have very high expectations of themselves, and frequently of their families. They don't believe in compromising their ideals.

INFJ is a natural nurturer; patient, devoted and protective. They make loving parents and usually have strong bonds with their offspring. They have high expectations of their children, and push them to be the best that they can be. This can sometimes manifest itself in the INFJ being hard-nosed and stubborn. But generally, children of an INFJ get devoted and sincere parental guidance, combined with deep caring.

In the workplace, the INFJ usually shows up in areas where they can be creative and somewhat independent. They have a natural affinity for art, and many excel in the sciences, where they make use of their intuition. INFJs can also be found in service-oriented professions. They are not good at dealing with minutia or very detailed tasks. The INFJ will either avoid such things, or else go to the other extreme and become enveloped in the details to the extent that they can no longer see the big picture. An INFJ who has gone the route of becoming meticulous about details may be highly critical of other individuals who are not.

The INFJ individual is gifted in ways that other types are not. Life is not necessarily easy for the INFJ, but they are capable of great depth of feeling and personal achievement.

Jungian functional preference ordering:

Dominant: Introverted Intuition

Auxiliary: Extraverted Feeling

Tertiary: Introverted Thinking

Inferior: Extraverted Sensing